Lessons from an Unlit Candle
Looking down into an unlit candle, I don’t doubt the candlewick’s ability to light a flame. Unless the wick has completely sunk into the wax, I believe it will contribute to the formation of fire at the appropriate time.
This is in contrast to my tendency to be skeptical of things that haven't yet ignited. Of course, there are times in life when opportunities "slip" down like a candlewick into the wax to the point of no return, but then there are times when I lose patience with a lack of results, answers, or clarity when there might be something more…
But an unlit candlewick reminds me that even though sometimes we have to say "goodbye" to a candle before we're ready, that doesn't mean there won't be other candles that bring forth fire when the time is right.
When the clock is ticking, and I'm focused on time, this is difficult work. Still, the more I learn about candles and all of the variables a candlemaker must consider when selecting the right wick—the diameter of the container that will hold it, the type of wax used, how it had to be tested, and so many other factors—it becomes clear that there are many steps to this process. The same is true of the unlit candles in my life.
What I'm learning from this is that I want to be able to look at something that isn't lit and not doubt its ability to light up at the right time. Even if I have to say goodbye to a candle that can no longer be lit, I want to grieve that, and in time, I want to believe there will be other opportunities to fill this room with light in the future.
So, the next time you look down at a candle and see the wick, I hope you can feel confident that it will light when the time is right. Of course, not always. However, something may appear to have ended when it is simply unlit. You're free to consider the possibility that, among all the things you've said "goodbye" to, other things might still ignite in their time. Holding that tension is hard, but I just hope you can remember the possibility of a flame that might be.
